Category Archives: slackmistress

Talking About Practice

This is the first photo ever taken of my wife Nina and I together. It was taken six years ago last night prior to what was at the time referred to as a practice date.


Most people have never been on a practice date, I never had before this one and I’ve never been on one since, but it was our attempt to minimize the risk of going from being friends to dating. We agreed that we would go on a casual risk free date and if it didn’t work we could abort the whole idea and continue being friends.

In retrospect, the fact that I was in her home prior to the date and we were posing for photos should have clued me in on the fact that she might have been leaning towards things working out between us.

Last night my wife was working and I wasn’t feeling well so I went to bed without realizing that on that same evening in the past, seemingly a lifetime ago, we posed for this photo and then left the house with no idea what we were starting.

Note: That thing behind us is Daisy J. Dog’s crate.

Secondary Note: She paid for the practice date, I paid for the first real date.

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Filed under Life of BetheBoy, marriage, slackmistress

Things That Change and Things That Do Not

When my doctor told me I was showing early indicators future heart problems I started making changes. I began eating better and exercising and as a result I’m getting healthier and losing weight. Here’s proof:

This is me with my wife in June of 2010:

This is me last night:

As you can see, I’m thinner and I’m raiding the late Dale Evan’s wardrobe for clothes because none of my old stuff fits anymore.

Because all of my old clothes are too big for me I have been updating my wardrobe with things that actually fit so today I went through my closet to remove all of the old stuff so I can donate it to someone who can use it. While I was going through clothes  and boxes I found a card:

(click to see full size)

This was given to me by my wife Nina about 2 months after we met. Those of you who know us and our story will remember this by the time we had known each other for two months we had already gotten engaged. She gave me this card just before heading home to visit her family. Here’s the inside:

(click to see full size)

Without a doubt, this is the best thing anyone has ever said to me. All I can add to this is that now that I’m healthier I hope to live long enough to say something half as good as this card.


Filed under marriage, slackmistress

I’ll Cast My Ballot For The Good Life

Election Day is a big deal for me and not just because I get to vote and wear a sticker all day.  It’s a big deal for me because on election night 2006, I met my wife Nina for the very first time.  I did not know at that time that my life was about to change for the better in every imaginable way.

Before Nina and I met she told me that our get together was not a date and that night she made it clear she had no intention of dating me; we were just two friends from the internet meeting each other to talk (seriously, she mentioned it multiple times…I know, I get it, you don’t like me, I’m a hideous monster).  I told her that I was fine with that and advised her that I would quietly and respectfully continue to think she was the best thing ever but not in a creepy way. We agreed that this was the best path to take and quietly said goodnight after she declined my offer to walk her to her car.

The next day I wrote this about her:

I met the Slackmistress last night. I’m not sure that I can describe her in a way that does her justice, because she’s just delightful. For a while I have read her site and been aware of her through the internet but that doesn’t come close to painting the picture. Imagine for a second that you’re a kid again and it’s a holiday. In the morning you see a big present with your name on it but you can’t open it until it gets dark so you wait all day and wonder what it could be. Well if when you open the present it’s everything you wanted and more, your present would be the Slackmistress.

We continued to talk beyond that Election Day, usually over instant messenger. She was not aware of the fact that I would put on a fancy shirt and usually a jacket when we did this. Dressing up to chat was a secret I found easier to keep  than the secret that I wanted to see her again.  Eventually we did see each other again for another non date and then another after that. In a span of a few weeks it became apparent that there was something happening that we both wanted to be a part of. We couldn’t explain it, but we knew it was good so six months later we got married. I still don’t understand what exactly happened in the weeks after Election Day 2006,  I just know that I’m happy for all of it.  I’ll vote for that every time.

Nina, Daisy and me in our hobo chic backyard. Photo copyright Lisa Jane Persky.


Filed under marriage, slackmistress