A Month and a Picture

It’s been a month since my father passed away and I’m still feeling much the same as I did when I first heard the news.  The last 30 days have been a blur of shock, grief, anger and disbelief but through it all there have been unforgettable acts of kindness from friends and family.

There have also been small moments  that remind me to be grateful for the time I had with my father.  One of those small moments was when a long time family friend and all around top-notch guy sent me the picture below.

Mike & Anthony A.

From left to right is my father and a neighbor that I don’t remember.  It’s 1966 or 1967 which makes my dad at least 11 but no older than 12.

In the last few weeks I’ve seen about 200 photos of my father but this one is my favorite because of the look on his face.   When I knew him, my father always seemed endlessly confident, like he knew all of the answers in advance and was just watching things play out while he waited for his moment.  I always assumed that he developed this trait as an adult but this picture tells me that he may have had it all along.

It hurts every time I remember he’s gone because I know that I’m never going to turn to him in a moment of trouble, see that look on his face and feel like everything is going to be okay.

Update: Over the past week I’ve shared this picture with some friends who have all pointed out how much I look like my dad does in the photo above.  To that I say two things: Thanks for telling me I look like a 12 year old boy and you are correct.  Please see the photo of me below.

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Take away my glasses and trade the flask for a football and I look just like my dad did when he was a kid, right down to the smarty pants smirk on my face.

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5 Comments

Filed under General Tomfoolery

5 responses to “A Month and a Picture

  1. Mikey H

    You are the salt of the earth, mister.

  2. No matter what your age or circumstances, it’s hard to face the vacuum that forms when a parent dies. When I lost both of mine, I realized I had lost the only source of unconditional love in my life, that no one saw me or loved me the same way. Still hurts 17 years later.

  3. What’s creepy is that you look exactly the same now as you did in that picture. Maybe 6 inches taller, but not much else has changed.

    The cycle of grieving is completely unpredictable, and will sometimes come back to bite you in the ass years later. I actually broke down and cried when I passed by the now closed Robeks on Sunset; my friend Chris used to go there every morning and was the only one in the office who agreed with me that it was better than Jamba Juice.

  4. I don’t think you ever “outgrow” your parents. You could be 500 years old and it would be meaningful to still have them around.

    Sorry for your loss.

  5. You DO look like your father. It’s the expression on your face.

    I’m really sorry to hear about his passing.

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