How Not To Buy A Car

I am not buying a car.

I am not selling a car either.  But someone named Ron thought I was.

I got a voice mail from Ron on Tuesday evening.  Ron wanted to buy a truck.   Since I don’t have one to sell, I assumed it was a mistake and I didn’t bother calling the guy back.

As I was driving home my phone rang but I  didn’t have my hands free device on so I let it go to voicemail.  It was Ron again.  I figured he’d realize he had the wrong number soon enough.

On Wednesday I could hear my phone ringing twice while eating dinner.  I let it ring.  When I was finished eating, there were two messages for me but I recognized the number from the day before.  It was Ron.  I decided to do the right thing: I called Ron to tell him he had the wrong number.  It went to voicemail. I said:

“Hey buddy, my name is Will and you’ve been calling me about a truck.  I’m sorry to tell you this but you’ve got the wrong number.  Good luck getting that truck.”

End of story, right?

Not quite.

This afternoon I was checking my voicemail. Included in the calls were two messages from Ron.  On the first call he was edgy…he really wanted that truck.  I figured the next one would be more of the same but I thought I had already resolved it with my call the night before.

I pressed “next message” and heard this:

“Pick up your f*cking phone you piece of sh*t.  I’ve been trying to call you.  Pick up your f*cking phone.”

Wow!  I know he was frustrated, I know he wanted that truck and I know I hadn’t answered but who leaves messages like that?  Imagine if I was selling a truck.  What kind of negotiating tactic is this?  I’ve bought cars and I’ll tell you this for free: calling someone a piece of sh*t will probably cost you some leverage in your negotiations.

I deleted the message. But that’s still not the end of the story.  I was angry, the guy told me to pick up my f*cking phone and called me a piece of sh*t.  This kind of telephone aggression is not acceptable, even if he is frustrated.  Hey, I tried to help the guy.

I don’t know what you would do but I called him back to tell him how many ways he could go f*ck himself.  I felt better immediately.



Filed under General Tomfoolery

20 responses to “How Not To Buy A Car

  1. ty

    that ron. the other day he called our house and said he left his morton’s leftovers here. i told him hey we cook around here.

    dude was not deterred.

  2. Yeah. No telling what this guy was hoping for with that tactic. Maybe if you understood how frustrated he was, you’d call back and just offer him the truck for free?

  3. lol i wouldve called him and told him to go f*ck himself too.

  4. Obviously, you should have sold him the f*cking truck. A**hole.

  5. Next time forward angry wrong numbers to me. Tell them I’m your assistant and I’ll be so polite that he won’t remember which end to shit from. :D

    I’ll send you a copy of my resume; references are available on request.

  6. Bh

    Pause to consider that you might be losing your 15 minutes of fame and fortune. Perhaps it’s a “reality show” production come a knockin’.

    From “Punked junk”, “Howie whocares”, “Not Model behavior,” and “Lets Makem Curze on their cellphone,” what once was tame candid camera fare setups has been upped a notch or three. Some real and some kid wanna-bees.

    Recently I took a driver refresher and there was a segment on aggressive driving and the notched up Road Rage. A lady/student in the class described making a foolish but minor road mistake but then the offended party pulled right adjacent, rolled down the window and screamed a blue cloud of expletives in her direction. She said she was quite scared but that only the closeness of his car prevented her from getting out of hers to counter-berate him nose to nose! (yikes).

    I saw that years ago I’d be rolling up my own windows and checking for a clean exit. If I see at now, I start looking for the hidden camera and producer! (yikes x2)

  7. Dara Y

    I think Ron needs to increase his fiber intake.

    You know what they say…”clear the bowels, clear the mind.”

    Maybe then he won’t be so cranky.

  8. betheboy

    Bh- You make some outstanding points.

    Dara – I had not heard that saying but I will start following that advice.

  9. I’m having a similar problem! I keep getting phone calls for a guy named Brandon and his family. They’ve been going on since before Christmas, and I’m too afraid to call the guy back and tell him he has the wrong number.

    The thing is, he’s called like 15 times now, and I keep sending his calls straight to voicemail. My voicemail CLEARLY states that my name is Alison, yet he leaves messages anyway.

    I’m waiting for the messages to escalate into anger. So far they’ve been very baseline, and he hasn’t even asked “are you avoiding me?” or “why aren’t you calling?”

    The greatest wrong number I ever got, though, was from a guy who had been given the slip by some chick at a bar who didn’t like him. He and I had a long conversation, he was really pissed, I thought it was pretty amusing :)

  10. Paul L.

    You didn’t recognize my voice, you f*cking piece of sh*t?

  11. what a complete d*uchebag

  12. What a freak! I wish I’d had that kind of interest in the driveway couch…which is FINALLY gone!

  13. So you didn’t sell him the truck?

  14. I want to know how the conversation went. Did you actually talk to him or get his voice mail? If you talked to him what did he say?

  15. Will Campbell

    I would’ve told him to go fuck himself AND posted his phone number.

    PS. I’ll give you $6500 for the d*mn truck. That’s my final f*cking o*fer.

  16. Tag

    Some people simply make it to easy for us to tell them to go f**k themself.

    What a great service Ron offered you. Who needs a therapist when Ron is out walking the world.

    I hope he calls again so you can leave him a voice mail with NOFX song; “Fun Things To F**K”

  17. kim

    Poor Ron sounds desperate. Maybe you could sell him a random truck in the neighborhood?

  18. TheOtherWill

    This does not sound like the Chico I know.
    The Chico I know would not of told Ron to get Fucked.
    The Chico I know would of had Ron pick up the truck at his house, 187 Crenshaw Blvd,South Cental L.A.

  19. good topic. thanks for sharing knowledge

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s