I’m Not Telling You How To Raise Your Kids

Yesterday, The Mrs. and I went to catch a matinee showing of Superbad at The Grove. As we waited for the movie to start, in walks a mother with her two kids who looked to ages 4 and 6 years old. Now I’m not a parent, but I support shoddy parenting; however, we were surprised because we knew full well that we were about to watch what was essentialy a two hour dick joke (a smartly done, hillarious two hour dick joke by the way).

Anyone who knows me or has read this blog understands that my mother was pretty permissive parent; my mom took me to see Purple Rain in the theatre, as kids my siblings and I watched whatever we wanted on TV, drank beer and stayed up all night. The reason that this didn’t end in disaster for us was because my mother kept up a steady dialouge with us to make sure we understood what we were seeing and doing. Meaning I could watch Apollonia show her goods in Purple Rain but I would get a stern lecture on the drive home about not taking girls to the fake lake Minnetonka.

Now, I’m not about to tell anyone what kind of movies to take their kids to. You can take your children to The TomKat Theatre on a schoolday for all I care but if you take the kids to something that isn’t age appropriate I hope that you’re prepared to answer the questions that will follow. In the case of the mother and childern who attended Superbad with us, I imagine that the ride home went like this:

– “Mommy, what does ‘pounding vag’ mean?”
– “The cops said that McLovin got cock blocked, do they sell cock blocks atToys ‘R Us?”

I hope they enjoyed the movie, but I’m glad we didn’t have to drive home with them.

For the record, Superbad was two hours of comedy gold.


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