I decided to check my progress on my road back to normal living by checking Wikipedia for information on the stages of grief. According to the first and only page I clicked on, the stages of grief are: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Those seem like no fun at all, plus I can’t figure out which one eating cake every day falls under.
The only stage on that list I’ve experienced so far is denial. I’m beginning to think that these stages may not fit my situation. To the best of my knowledge, after denial I experienced: cake eating, telling inappropriate stories, getting a haircut and finally singing out loud while driving.
I think I’d like to stick with these stages because they seem like more fun than anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Can someone please update the wiki accordingly?
14 Comments
November 10, 2009 at 8:49 pm
Does this qualify as bargaining?
November 10, 2009 at 8:52 pm
The best answer to that question would be to get angry at you, then depressed and finally accept you are right.
November 10, 2009 at 9:54 pm
I’m in, but only if we can have a beer while you do so.
November 10, 2009 at 9:19 pm
I had a bad breakup earlier this summer, which obviously doesn’t compare to what you’re going through, but god DAMN was top-of-the-lungs singing in the car therapeutic for me. Specifically most of Born to Run and Greetings From Asbury Park.
November 10, 2009 at 9:39 pm
Pete,
The singing definitely helps and I appreciate you jumping in with a comment but I have to tell you that I think you know a little bit about what I’m going through. Like a bad breakup my dad’s passing has had an effect on every part of my life and i feel like nothing will ever be the same again. In some ways the breakup may be harder because people don’t rally to support you like they do when you’re mourning.
If mourning is anything more like a breakup my dad is going to start sleeping with a friend of mine any day now. Then I’ll devise a tragically flawed plan to get him back. When that fails I’ll call him all the time asking why he hurt me. Later when my dad’s fling with the friend is over he’ll settle down with another family. I’ll tell him that I’m happy but secretly I’ll be hoping that he misses me or at very least his new family isn’t as cool as I am. Eventually I’ll get over.
November 10, 2009 at 10:00 pm
No matter what you do to deal with it, it’s good that you are dealing with it, and talking about it a lot (on the blog, anyway). My dad passed away 4 years ago under similarly sudden circumstances, and I had so much to do logistically before/during/after his death that I never had a chance to grieve and mourn and just vent like a normal human being should.
Watching your show last weekend, it was like I was finally doing all those things by proxy. Thank you for that.
November 11, 2009 at 12:25 am
Thank you for the encouragement and for watching on Saturday. There’s no handbook for getting through this so I guess I’m not breaking any rules.
November 11, 2009 at 12:57 am
I think the cake thing goes with all of the stages.
Or else the depression and anger stages would be well… Full of sad, and lots of holes in the walls.
Its better to tear into cake.
I offer hugs, cause I know its the shittiest thing in the world, and no one can know exactly how you feel.
*hugs*
November 11, 2009 at 2:22 am
cake!
i’ve always like you’re version of ‘the plan’ better than anyone elses.
November 11, 2009 at 4:44 am
I would update the Wikipedia page for you but I’m still banned.
My personal stages of grief are all bourbon-based.
November 11, 2009 at 5:18 pm
Just as long as you aren’t singing Air Supply out loud, or heck, even listening to Air Supply, I think your stages are just fine!
November 12, 2009 at 7:14 am
if you run out of cake, I have lots and can mail you some. yes, frosting too. lots of it.
November 12, 2009 at 11:51 pm
Man I prefer you stages as well and knowing dad the way we did I think he would of to especially the telling inappropriate stories and singing out loud!!!!
November 13, 2009 at 4:30 pm
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