Warning: This post touches on adult topics but I’m going to try my best to keep it PG-13 since my family reads this.
Recently, my wife shared a bit of information about what happens behind closed doors at our house so it’s only fair that I do the same.
Last night, after out live chat show had ended and we had gotten home from grabbing a late night snack it was time for bed…except I wasn’t ready to sleep yet.
I made my move but my wife made it clear that she was ready to get to sleep; I had no problem with that, there’s always the morning. But here is what I DID have a problem with: As I turned to go to sleep my wife says:
You can ______ if you want.
-What?
I’m just saying it’s okay.
So this is what happens after you’re married for a few years? I was never told I would have to get permission to do certain things from the Wenis Commissioner, AKA-The Queen of Spanking.
14 Comments
April 26, 2009 at 7:16 pm
Mad Libs! Fun!
April 26, 2009 at 7:17 pm
LOL i love this. it sounds like something id totally say.
April 26, 2009 at 7:17 pm
Welcome to reality, Will.
April 26, 2009 at 7:18 pm
Um, that’s sorta happened to me. Not because I need her permission to do that kind of thing, though. It’s more her saying “Listen, I understand having an urge hit, and it’s cool if you have to take care of it, even if it takes me a little bit longer to get to sleep.”
Hell, sometimes a few minutes of being next to that sort of thing is enough to change it from a solo act to a two-person party.
April 26, 2009 at 7:37 pm
Wenis Commissioner should be capitalized.
Signed,
The Wenis Commissioner
April 26, 2009 at 7:39 pm
Dear Wenis Commissioner,
It already is.
Signed,
The Commissioner of Looking at Things
April 26, 2009 at 8:47 pm
So…did you?
April 26, 2009 at 8:58 pm
Yeah, so did you end up washing the car?
April 26, 2009 at 10:30 pm
I did not. Getting permission took most of the fun out of it.
April 27, 2009 at 12:25 am
Oh so funny ….hopefully in a few more years she will still be saying that.
April 27, 2009 at 1:46 am
Something tells me The Wenis Commissioner should have an advice column…
April 27, 2009 at 6:43 pm
Because we’re easily entertained, most wives have been known to wait for the first half snore before we poke you in the ribs to let you know you can poke away…
April 28, 2009 at 2:42 pm
Guy falls in love with a deaf woman. They get married. Wife takes a pen and pad of paper an writes, “I know you are always very horny. How should I know to tell you if I do or don’t want to have sex?”
Husband writes back, “If you want to have sex, just pull on “it” 8 times and if you don’t want to have sex, just pull on it 375 times.”
April 28, 2009 at 4:47 pm
“…i’m just sayin…”